Happy New Year?… 

Why must we keep rehashing the issue? The physical pain I feel is remembrance enough to last a lifetime. I dream the pain I wake up in pain I move in pain I breath pain…. it could of been worse they say, but does that make the pain go away? 

Mentally my walls are cracked my back is broken and I’m not sure how to get my sanity back…. I know the physical will eventually leave but who will fix the mental piece…. 

Dreams of rage of fire of shame, dreams of dying as the shots runs though my brain…. So why must we keep rehashing?….

Forget, I want to forget but how do I achieve that when the chants becomes louder “You deserve it” they say, you know it will never go away it was part of their plan so will you let it stand or will you open your hand and give your dart a chance to calm your heart and dance?

 Pop a pill to ease the pain pop a pill so your dark remains sane ….Now I see that this is why they take their lives and the others too ….the dark is strong and it’s getting stronger… Pop a pill to make it weak will they know that the struggle is real?… No, no because If we continue to tell ourselves that it was us that caused the pain, then we can keep the dark at bay…. “Move slow” don’t listen…”breath calm” don’t listen… “break the restraint” don’t listen….When will it stop?! 
NattyODou 

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